Tukayote Helianthus: Unkillable
RECOVERY, EMOTION, DANCE, PHOTOS, AND TUNES.
NO ANESTHESIA. NO BULLSHIT. ALL LOVE.
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Emotional urges can hijack the wheel fast. You know the choice won’t help, you see the outcome coming—and sometimes you do it anyway. For me, that looks like food that spikes my blood sugar. Tonight, I didn’t use a skill I know works: Opposite Action. And I’m living with the consequence. But this isn’t about shame. It’s about agency. DBT skills don’t make urges disappear—they give you a moment of choice inside the chaos. That moment is power. And every moment after is another chance to use it.
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One month ago, I walked away from the IT industry—not impulsively, but out of necessity. What finally broke the spell wasn’t burnout or boredom, but a deeper realization: staying was costing me my emotional and physical health. This is the story of choosing emotional sobriety, radical self-love, and a different path forward—one rooted in recovery, integrity, and freedom. The road ahead is unknown, but it’s no longer the one that was slowly wearing me down.
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A spontaneous tattoo on Bourbon Street nearly killed me. What started as a tired, impulsive “YOLO” decision during a solo road trip turned into a severe infection and a real brush with sepsis. Years later, that same tattoo has become a daily reminder that time is finite and choices matter. I don’t read “You Only Live Once” as recklessness anymore — I read it as responsibility. One life. One body. One shot to spend my hours on what actually brings meaning, joy, and integrity.
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